Ever have one of those once in a lifetime friendships you think will last forever, and it doesn’t? There is no falling out, no argument, no confrontation. It just ends, with no rhyme or reason. 

I had one of these many years ago. I was in my first year of college, 1300 some odd miles from home, and had some serious life experiences happening. Her name was Meg and the school arranged for her to just kinda be there for me. In the beginning, I was wondering if she was only there for me out of a sense of obligation, but the more we did together, the more I realized it wasn’t that.  We had a legitimate friendship, and for the first time in my entire life, I felt like I belonged somewhere.

At the end of that first year of college, I moved back home to go to school and deal with stuff happening to me and around me. We vowed to keep in touch, despite the distance. And we did! For all of a year. I even went to New York from Georgia to visit, and made another lifelong friend along the way.

We continued to keep in touch after the visit through Facebook, emails, and phone calls. The Facebook and emails went from few and far between to nothing and the phone calls began to go unanswered. To my knowledge I hadn’t done anything offensive or to warrant a “break up”. I tried many Facebook messages just to ask what, if anything, had happened. Nothing. Nada. Zilch. 

I gave up, and eventually through my Facebook spring cleaning binges I unfriended her and moved on reluctantly from a friend who was there for me through some rough times and meant the world to me. It was heartbreaking. 

A few years later, I caught up on Facebook with the mutual friend I made through her and we are in touch quite often to this day. He and his wife are also godparents to my children. I once asked if he knew what had happened. Either he truly doesn’t or he played dumb, but that conversation went nowhere. That was okay. 

About six months ago, plagued by curiosity, I typed her name into the Facebook search bar, and there she was. Engaged to a preacher and living in North Carolina. I decided to shoot her a friend request, and see what transpired. My friend request was accepted. Almost immediately. That’s where it all ceased. No responses to messages, comments, or likes. Why my friend request went accepted is beyond me. 

Through Facebook I found out she is getting married next week, and I feel so much joy for her to have found the one and I wish her all the happiness in the world. Deep down, I miss the only friend who ever truly cared about me. A huge part of me wants to send her well wishes on Facebook. While another part says that season of life is over, it was nice while it lasted, and I need to let go. Do I sound crazy? I feel crazy. 

Such are the mysteries in this thing called life. 

-K

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